The Hometown That Held You

You know two things about the place you were raised, you love it.. and you hate it.

You hate the trapped feeling it gave you in your teenage years, like you’d never get out, like you’d be shackled to this place forever. You hate how the people here seem like they never change, like they never grow. You hate watching everyone who got out live a new life in a new place when you’re still here, waiting on someday.

You love the security of your comfortable patterns here. You love the feeling of knowing all the back roads and where to get the best burgers. You love that your friends are only ever 20 minutes away from you and you love that you always know what to expect from the people that live here.

Someday comes.

Here you are, not shackled anymore but the truth is, you’re still tied. Tied to this place by heart strings and memories. This is the place that made you from scratch. The place that built you up, and in some cases tore you down. Be grateful. Grateful for those tear downs, because without them how else would you have learned to build?

We think we hate the home that held us, the easy breezy back yards we’ve played in since we could walk. You think you want new back roads and Sheetz instead of Wawa.

As you move on you’ll miss your once too small town. You’ll miss the people who reapted the same jokes. You’ll miss being able to go anywhere and see someone you knew.

Once someday comes, yesterday is gone. Tomorrow takes your breath away as you build a new life in a new place, but it doesn’t have the warmth of home… not yet. It doesn’t hold you when you cry anymore, it expects you to get up dust yourself off and get on with it.

All the love you have in the place you left will pull you through. You’ll know it’s possible to build here because you were taught how to do this before. Don’t let missing those comfortable patterns trick you into turning around. Stick it out through the days that are tough on your heart, be grateful it’s still beating. Be grateful it can feel something, even if that something is pain.

You will go into the next phase of your life unaware of what it will bring. Newness might go easy on you, it may sweep you away in a feel good feeling. It may be hard on your heart, the change it brings may unsettle your soul. Either way the good will always loop back around to pick you up.

Someday is here, it’s always here. Someday you’re going to get where you’re going, and you’re going to go where you’ve been.

Just remember that in all this coming and going, home is where the grateful heart is.


Good Bones

Building a life is hard work. There are missteps, miscalculations, and misunderstandings. Issues will arise for the entirety of your life, but it’s how you build that life that shows if you’ll withstand all the winds that are bound to blow. The key to construction is to have good blue prints, a good crew, and good bones…like a house.

Start with a strong foundation. Self-love is like concrete, sturdy and buildable. It sets the stage for all that comes after and is the deciding factor on whether you build your life for you or make your life a cookie cutter for someone else. Everything you build, with self-love as your backbone, is made to last. It makes room for improvement and if your foundation cracks, you have the tools to fix it. So, before you jump into this life take a moment to reflect on what you want it to look like. Make detailed blueprints and always have a backup plan backed by self-love.

Build yourself up from there, a house is steady when it has good studs. Surround yourself with people who will stand tall and strong when the wind blows. The structure may sway but that’s the leeway you need to bounce back.

The walls are your boundaries, don’t let hate or hurt cross them, and be mindful of the people you let past them. Some will love you deeply, others will scar your heart. And like the holes you make in the drywall when you’re spiraling out of control, scars can be hard to mend. Save yourself the hardship and only let the love in.

Make the guest room a place for your troubles, because they can’t stay forever and decorate with passion. Add rich colors that hold your head when you’ve had a long day. Decorate your life with texture and excitement. I hope you re-paint every once in a while, when you feel you need a change, and you never let your life get boring.

Your house like your life, should be built with room to grow. It can change, and it can adapt, don’t be afraid to make additions and add rooms.

Your life can be big and boisterous, it can take up space like a mansion in the hills. Or, it can be small and quiet, it can make room like a rancher on a dead-end street.

Whatever you want your life to look like, be sure to build it with good bones. A house with good bones won’t fall, and neither will you.